


heart heist

by Yeoun (Bakagami)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Police, M/M, Vigilantism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2015-03-15
Packaged: 2018-03-16 16:32:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3495251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bakagami/pseuds/Yeoun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>yifan’s a police officer. yixing’s side job is selling sugar disguised as crack cocaine. he’s also the greatest thief of the 21st century.</p>
            </blockquote>





	heart heist

**Author's Note:**

> written for the [kissfanxing](http://kissfanxing.livejournal.com/) valentine's day event, prompt #70. crossposted from [lj](http://yeoun.livejournal.com/3650.html).

Yifan’s fresh out of the police academy. They pair him up with a wolf behind a pretty face. (He’s menacing, Lu Han is.)  

It’s a Monday morning and, honestly, no amount of coffee in the world could make Yifan any less grouchier, especially when they pull over someone speeding 90 on a 55 road. It’s seven in the morning, for Christ’s sake.  

When Lu Han gleefully flicks on their sirens, Yifan slumps in his seat and stuffs the rest of his doughnut into his mouth.  

(Really, the only reason Yifan is partnered with Lu Han is because Lu Han can’t keep his damn hands off his previous partner, Minseok. It not like Minseok doesn’t enjoy it, from what Yifan can tell, but they literally let a car chase breeze by them in favor of doing things Yifan doesn’t want to think about.) 

Yifan walks over to the driver in question and pulls out his ticket pad. Lu Han follows him just to be annoying and once he catches sight of the driver, he starts laughing, “Yixing? Is that you?” 

Of course. _Of course_ Lu Han would know him. Yifan tries not to put his head in his hands and almost fails before collecting himself to raise his eyebrows at the offender, ignoring Lu Han’s gross giggling.  

“Really? 90? Where’s the fire?” 

It takes a moment for Yixing to compose himself from whatever he needs to compose himself from. The way Yixing’s lips part slightly when they make eye contact shouldn’t be that enticing, Yifan thinks, before mentally pinching himself. (Or was that actually Lu Han?) 

Yixing sheepishly scratches his head. “Sorry, I’m late for a business meeting,” he dimples ( _shit_ , he’s cute, Yifan concludes with dread) and Yifan notices his untied tie, untucked button down.  

Clearing his suddenly dry throat, Yifan points at one of his buttons, “Your shirt is uneven.”  

After realizing what he says, Yifan backtracks and puts on his best glare, acting like it’s the most difficult thing in the world to tuck away his ticket pad in his back pocket. “I’ll let you go with a warning this time. I better not catch you breaking the law again, Mr.—” 

“Zhang Yixing,” Yixing says, smiling widely (like Yifan even _asked_ for his name) and nodding at his nametag, “Thank you, Officer Yifan.” 

Yifan curtly nods and turns on his heel, determinedly trying to maintain his posture and waving a “good day” over his shoulder. He settles back in his seat and grumpily waits for Lu Han to stop wasting his working hours by talking to the adorable, dimply, what— 

Lu Han looks back at him, still talking to Yixing, smirk evident on his face. Yixing’s eyes flicker to him through the rearview, crinkling a little bit at the corners. What. 

Yifan doesn’t freak out. (Okay, he does. A little.)

 

 

 

 

(Lu Han proceeds to tell Yixing about Yifan’s whole work schedule and coyly suggests he get in trouble more often if it would help prevent the inevitable frown wrinkles Yifan’s bound to get. 

“You think?” Yixing asks, ‘business meeting’ long forgotten.  

He peers at the police cruiser behind them through the mirror and catches Yifan looking like he’s hyperventilating. Yifan pushes the hair out of his eyes and rolls the windows up and down frantically. It’s cute. 

“Uh, _yes_ ,” Lu Han declares. Yixing suspects Lu Han just likes to see Yifan not know how to control his own limbs coherently, but, what the heck. So does Yixing, apparently.)

 

 

 

 

As it turns out, Yixing doesn’t _actually_ have a job. He could, if getting Yifan’s last nerve while looking adorably guilty was one.  

Somehow, during every single one of his shifts, Yixing finds a way to get in trouble. It’s never really enough to arrest him for it and he always beams his way out of it. 

This is about the fifth time ever since Yifan pulled him over that they’ve met over some sort of minor infraction, like Yixing soliciting in front of a building that has a sign warning people to not do just as such. Or Yixing trying to sell kids crack cocaine, except it’s actually powdered sugar.  

It's really not that bad, especially with Yixing flirting his way out of trouble like he's just shy of asking Yifan out on a date. But Yifan likes to act like Yixing personally offends him because he's supposed to be policing some sort of law in this lawless world.  

Then, suddenly, Yifan finds himself haphazardly thrown into a renewed, refueled, countrywide manhunt for “the greatest thief of our time” (as sarcastically dubbed by Kyungsoo, who currently agonizes over the little to no evidence that’s left behind after every heist). 

Lu Han speeds Yifan and Kyungsoo to the site of the heist and Yifan follows them under the caution tape. According to the detectives already at the scene, this is the third incident with the same thief. One of their specialists—“Chanyeol,” his laminated badge on his lanyard helpfully flashes—bends down to all but press his cheek to the cement.  

“Yup, it’s the guy,” Chanyeol affirms when he gets up, wiping the dirt off his hands, “Same shoe size, same stride length. If that’s the case, it’s doubtful we’ll find anything else.” 

Kyungsoo glares at him and punches his shoulder, “Don't be so negative.”  

Chanyeol whines, rubbing where he got hit and Kyungsoo sighs, turning to Lu Han and Yifan and looking apologetic. “Just keep an eye out for anyone or anything suspicious. We’ll get back to you guys if we figure anything out.” 

Lu Han nods and Yifan lifts his gaze to scan the block, eyes widening when he sees Yixing leaning against the wall a few buildings away. He watches as Yixing lifts his hand in a lazy wave and winks, before slipping out of sight.  

Yifan tries not to think about what it means.

 

 

 

 

Yixing doesn’t show for a few days.  

With most of the police department focused on the recently stolen diamond piece, things are boringly stagnant, even for Yifan.  

So that’s when Yixing rolls up next to where Yifan is in the middle of a stakeout with a wide smile and box of doughnuts. Lu Han’s been assigned another location to oversee for the rest of the night. (Damn him.) 

“Evening, Officer.” 

Ticking his eyebrow, Yifan rolls down his window and eyes the doughnuts. “You’re not up to any trouble, are you,” Yifan says in a flat voice, because this is Yixing and Yixing likes to mess with him. 

“Of course not,” Yixing hums, handing the box to Yifan and going around to open up the passenger side door. When he slips into the seat, Yifan sputters, “You’re not supposed to—” 

Holding a finger to his lips, Yixing glitters at him. “This can be our first date. Don’t worry,” he says, “The person you’re supposed to watch passed out a while ago. Too drunk to function.” 

Yifan doesn’t even want to know how Yixing knows the state of said suspect. Or how he knows who the suspect even is. He just eats his doughnut meekly and watches Yixing out of his peripheral, who sips his tea from a mug like this is all normal.  

When he’s finished with eating, Yifan doesn’t really know what to do with his hands. They twitch by his side and he ends up curling his fingers into fists on his thighs. 

Yixing tips his head over and suddenly, Yifan turns to see Yixing inches from his face, smiling widely. Yixing is disarmingly (unfairly) attractive and Yifan lets out a surprised breath at the sight in front of him. 

“What are you thinking about,” Yixing drawls, voice all low and close and distressingly deep. His eyes flicker down to Yifan’s mouth and drag back up slowly to meet his eyes and Yifan parts his lips.

“Nothing. I don't know. You. And how pretty you are.” 

Yixing looks surprised at his response but quickly schools his features into a smirk. “Really, now?” 

Yifan gulps and wishes he didn’t finish off his doughnut so fast. He grips the steering wheel in an effort to preoccupy himself and Yixing makes a noise of dissatisfaction, causing Yifan to turn back to him. 

“Hey, look at me, not out the window. We're on a date, aren't we?” Yifan turns again to meet Yixing's gaze and watches as his eyelids droop.  

He feels like he’s been holding his breath for a while now, but as Yixing moves closer, he can’t bring himself to do anything about it. Yixing’s lips come to press against his own and everything sort of goes blank for a while. 

All Yifan can remember is the softness of Yixing’s mouth, the faint sweetness of a doughnut and the trace amounts of some sort of tea.  

It’s not until he feels hands crumpling his shirt that Yifan comes back to it, hands coming up to cup Yixing’s face tenderly. He strokes his thumb across Yixing’s cheek and they continue kissing, pulling away only to come back, soft and lazy. 

Yixing’s fingers twist the fabric of Yifan’s shirt and his other hand comes to cradle the back of Yifan’s neck. He tugs lightly on Yifan’s hair and presses a little closer.

And all too soon, Yixing draws back, lips startling red and satisfyingly swollen. His pupils are blown dark and his breath comes out in short puffs. “Good?” 

Yifan nods slowly, still a little dazed, “Very.” 

They sit in the car in silence, slowly catching their breaths as Yifan belatedly remembers he's actually in the middle of a stakeout and halfheartedly scans the premises. 

Yixing reaches over to grab his shirt collar and kisses him hard before he has time to realize what’s going on. After a few seconds, he lets go and opens the passenger side door, sliding out.  

“I’ll let you get back to your job, Officer Yifan,” he says, winking again, “Have a good night.” 

Yifan flounders a “good night” before Yixing closes the door and slips away. “Oh my god,” he whispers to himself in disbelief, putting his head in his hands and splaying himself on the steering wheel. 

“Oh my god.”

 

 

 

 

Later that week, Yixing periodically shows up to the police station with boxes of doughnuts and carriers filled with coffees. Lu Han wolf whistles every time Yixing makes his way to Yifan’s desk, but it mostly goes ignored.

Minseok likes to slap Lu Han after he does that. (It’s because Minseok’s just as possessive as Lu Han is. He just doesn’t like to show it as much.) 

“How's work?” Yixing asks, placing Yifan’s favorite doughnut and exact coffee order on his desk and prettily arranging himself alongside them. 

“At this rate, I'm scared you've murdered someone,” Yifan deadpans, taking a sip of the coffee anyway. “No one is always this nice to the police without a motive.” 

Yixing pouts and steals his coffee, taking a sip and wrinkling his nose after. “Maybe I just want to spend time with you, Officer. Maybe I want you to like me like how I like you.” 

“Besides, Valentine's Day is coming up,” Yixing continues, batting his eyelashes, like Yifan hasn’t noticed the increased pheromones through the station and along the streets. Like he hasn’t had to sift through piles of pink and red confections for some damn groceries. 

“And you’re going to be my Valentine,” he says with an air of finality, like Yifan was going to say no. 

Yixing leans in to steal a kiss before sashaying out, and Yifan wonders how his life has become like this.

 

 

 

 

Besides Yixing coming in to drop off Yifan's coffee, there’s not really a time to celebrate Valentine’s Day because, all of a sudden, the thief flashes a message about a time and place they’re going to show up in the next few hour.  

It’s at, like, the most inconvenient time, because Yifan has to call in to cancel his fancy dinner reservation for two. 

He and Lu Han arrive at the scene an hour early, planning to stake out the area and watch for any suspicious people coming in and out of the building. Surprisingly, and frustratingly, there is a lot of traffic going through the museum, making it hard to pinpoint any certain suspect. 

After a while of watching, Yifan catches the eye of one of the pedestrians and fights the urge to gasp audibly. Lu Han, bored, picks at his cuticles and lazily scans the crowd sporadically. 

Dressed in all black, Yixing grins across the crowd at Yifan, eyes crinkling up at the edges and all that cute shit. Yifan groans internally at Yixing’s mischievous twinkle (because that _can’t_ mean anything good), but before he can make a move, Yixing vanishes back into the throng of people. 

As the time specified approaches, more and more police come to surround the area, evacuating all of the people and surrounding the premises. 

Yixing gets the horrible feeling they won’t catch anyone tonight, but he goes along with what his superiors tell him to do, which is to go into the museum and station in all the rooms. 

He splits up with Lu Han once they get inside and not ten minutes later, they find one of the most expensive pieces is already gone. Chanyeol is brought in to inspect the area and he mutters under his breath about bad timing and infuriating geniuses. 

Pushing the hair back from his face, Yifan walks out of the building, shift already over thirty minutes ago.  

He loosens the top buttons of his shirt and as he walks towards his car, someone grabs his wrist and pulls him into a hidden alley.  

Before he can voice his surprise, Yixing pushes against him and hooks a hand behind Yifan’s neck, bringing him down to meet his lips. Yixing’s other hand skims over the fabric of Yifan’s shirt and down to cup Yifan through his pants. 

Moaning, Yifan rocks against the pressure of Yixing’s hand and kisses him back, parting his lips slightly. He feels the prodding of Yixing’s tongue against his lower lip and feels blood shoot straight to his cock before Yixing breaks the kiss, breathing hard.

Yifan can see the straining of Yixing’s pants and leans down, trying to capture Yixing’s lips again. 

“You’re so lovely,” Yixing murmurs, lashes fluttering. Yifan blushes, much to his amusement, and lets Yixing lead him back to his cruiser after they readjust themselves.  

He settles in the passenger seat and laces his fingers with Yifan’s, “Drive.” 

When they arrive at Yifan's apartment, Yifan pushes inside and Yixing kisses him in the dark. Yifan can hear pounding in his ears and he groans when Yixing rocks his hips against his own. 

Hooking his thumb into one of Yixing's belt loops, Yifan tugs experimentally and Yixing's movements stutter. 

Before he can do anything else, Yixing brandishes something from his pocket and drops it into Yifan’s shirt pocket, patting it satisfactorily. “Happy Valentine's Day,” he whispers, dimpling.  

Confused for a second, Yifan dips his fingers into his pocket and grasps at a cold metal object. When he pulls it out, he recognizes it from the sign in the museum, explaining the years of history and value behind it. 

“You’re—” Yifan has had the inkling over the past few weeks about Yixing's identity, but the actual evidence in front of him is the only thing confirming his suspicions.  

“Are you going to let me fuck you, or not?” Yixing whines, taking the expensive object from his hand and tossing it aside like he doesn’t steal irreplaceable treasures and cause the country to go into a panic on the weekly.  

Yifan winces at the thud it makes against his floor but is too distracted by the lips on his own to do anything about it. 

He’s fucked.  

Both metaphorically and literally. 

(Yixing continues to gleefully steal artifacts and priceless pieces of jewelry, much to the frustration of Yifan. But he doesn't really do anything about it besides let out a soul suffering sigh because Yixing just sells everything to the black market and donate the money to charities.) 

**Author's Note:**

> comments + kudos = ♥


End file.
